FAQ: My friend just told me she is trans. I am angry, confused and I just do not get it. How can she not be the person she was born to be? : Trans-Kin Blog
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FAQ: My friend just told me she is trans. I am angry, confused and I just do not get it. How can she not be the person she was born to be?

by Trans-Kin on 01/06/13

Trans-Kin: A Guide for Family and Friends of Transgender People has Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ).

 

Maybe you have thought about this question; we invite you to respond:

 

Q: My friend just told me she is trans. I am angry, confused and I just do not get it. How can she not be the person she was born to be?

 

A: Gender identity is about feelings not genitals. Even if you understand this, though, you will still probably have very mixed feelings, many of them negative, about what your friend told you. Remember even though she feels differently about her gender than you do, she really is the same person you love. Try to talk honestly with each other and explore what is the same in your relationship and what is different.

 

Or post your own question; we will answer any question!

Comments (2)

1. Diane Sparkes said on 1/9/13 - 11:59AM
If this transition is difficult for you, just imagine how it was for her. Changing gender has to be one of the most difficult situations any human being can ever face. Be happy for her, she needs her friends now more than ever before, and all you are asked to do is to love her without judgement. But I note that this is already happening as you use her and she as her pronoun, congratulations, that is the hardest thing to do, the rest is easy!
2. Barbara L. Hutton said on 1/10/13 - 08:31AM
Yes, it is difficult to use the proper pronoun. But it is an important first step It's a journey for everyone. There's an extensive pronoun chart in Trans-Kin that might be helpful for some people.


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